Online searches for "lesbian bar Ottawa" turned up nothing. Otherwise if you're a female-identified-gay-ish sort, the only other option is Queer Mafia which is an event-group that "takes-over" various social spaces in the city as advertised on their website. Your name is Monica? Nobody at the Hilton wanted to give the "aggressive-out-of-town-dyke-stranger-asking-creepy-questions" any names of local gay haunts. The job I love and hate?
Whether you're queer or questioning, this is the place where you can make great friends, and have a good time. Came back here and never left. Something to look at during a hour car ride would not go amiss. Now, if you read Effing Dykes with a fine-tooth comb I know you've been printing out your favorite entries and Mod Podge-ing them over your mirror , you doubtless know that I despise Canada. Otherwise I would fail my mission. Um, is anybody, um, sitting here? A lil' bit of masochism never hurt anybody. Finally, I decided to go to a place called "Swizzles", because it popped up on a website called Gay Ottawa and because it had such a faggy name. The job I love and hate? Anyone punching me "playfully" better be wearing latex gloves and have a safe word. Smug Canadian asshole bitches. What I needed was an interview. Spent some time in Chicago, though. Your name is Monica? Let me set the scene for you: Gays can get married here. Pause So what is that on your sweatshirt, anyway? Every time I see one - in an airport, on a plane, walking down the sidewalk - I feel like my heart is going to burst. Undaunted, I pounced on the front desk staff. Remember that weird job I had last year, where I travelled all the effing time? Monica was about 30 years my senior, but she was awfully nice and willing to let me rub my hands all over her buzzed hair. What do you guys do for fun around here? Couple dudes clearly in the middle of mid-life crisis, six or several very average gay men, a tranny, and one lone blond twink wandering about the room in a tight white t-shirt, very much aware that he is the best-looking, tannest, and youngest boy at Swizzles. I pushed open the doors. Otherwise if you're a female-identified-gay-ish sort, the only other option is Queer Mafia which is an event-group that "takes-over" various social spaces in the city as advertised on their website. There are a couple of gay boys hanging around, and a few nervous straight-looking guys in suits. This is because sporty dykes like to thump, pound, and sock other people's arms in greeting.
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